Perhaps it was to stand at the head of the class on that first day of school and blatantly challenge the teacher. Perhaps we struggled in the kitchen for two hours preparing his favorite food only to get a reaction of crying at the table. We stand back puzzled and wonder if there is something wrong with our child.
When we discuss this with other parents we discover that they too share this dilemma. Is it a children’s conspiracy to drive us crazy, or as Bill Cosby comically refers to it, is it “brain damage”? Whatever it is, they have it and they are making us catch it in the process!

What we are witnessing is a natural unveiling of both the child’s individuality and inherited nature. Beginning to show itself between the ages of five to seven and then more clearly between the seventh and fourteenth year, it is the building block of your child’s behavior for all later years. It is not craziness, conspiracy, or brain damage. It is not a defiant act or pure rebellion. It is not happening only to you or your child. It is happening everywhere, to everyone. What we are dealing with here is your child’s temperament.

The study of temperaments is nothing new. It has been around since the time of the Ancient Greeks. Most parents are not familiar with it because in our fast moving times where everyone has a product to sell or a gimmick, it is easier to label your child as a “problem” and to prescribe a treatment or a pill. We are responsible for this as consumers because, as a society, we have gotten away from taking responsibility for ourselves and our children. With our busy schedules and lives, it is easier to entrust our children’s behavior to the “experts” as we busily go about our day.

If the child walks around with droopy shoulders and head hung low, we immediately jump to the conclusion that whatever problem we have has taken affect on him. If the child is loud, aggressive, and forceful, we assume that we must have been slack in the area of manners. If the child is constantly snacking and foraging for food, we instantly foresee a weight problem. and try to keep snacks away from the child. If the child has difficulty concentrating on any one thing, we assume some attention deficit and reach for medication.

These are not the answers to the problems we all face with our children.

The answer comes in recognizing and understanding our children and the four temperaments. We must realize first and foremost that there is no good or bad temperament; each has both positive and negative traits. All people have qualities and attributes that could fall into any of the four temperaments, but one temperament always dominates. The domineering factor is usually influenced by the physical build of the child. Rudolf Steiner wrote “As a rule, melancholic children are tall and slender, the sanguine have the most normal build. Phlegmatic children tend to be round with protruding shoulders, and those with a short, stout build so that the head almost sinks into the body are the cholerics.”

Once we learn a little about temperaments and how to relate to them, our lives will be much easier. It is even more important to note that our children will blossom in front of our eyes when they feel finally understood. Petty Staley in Between Form and Freedom: A Guide to the Teenage Years writes “The way we as adults react to our children’s temperament strongly affects the child’s self image and way of approaching people and tasks. The basic rule is: Go with the temperament, not against it. The child needs the opportunity to experience the world through the temperament and in that way to achieve balance.”

The Melancholic Child

This slender child walks through life as if each step takes the greatest effort to take. She’s often sad with a soft and quiet voice, hardly finishing a sentence. He dwells on the negative and the suffering of everything around him. She appears to have the weight of the world on her shoulders. He seems so involved with himself that you may think he is selfish. When you plan something nice for this child, she doesn’t seem happy and you may mistake it for a lack of appreciation, but this child is already thinking that soon it will be over and done. If you are in a hurry, he seems to take twice as long to get ready. I am blessed with a melancholic child and before I understood his temperament I swore he was out to deliberately hurt me! He is perhaps the most misunderstood child of all the temperaments.

The best medicine for this child is to let him wallow in his suffering. She needs it–it is the very food for her soul. This must be viewed as a simple indulgence and not carried to the point of ignoring the child. Sharing stories of your own anguish brings you closer to this child. This child craves security and order, and a routine or steady rhythm is very important. Prepare him for any changes and express your discomfort with the change in plans as well. Sympathize with his sense of loss. Reading stories about triumph despite all odds are very beneficial to this child. This child is also the one who enjoys slapstick comedy and silly behavior.

The Sanguine Child

This child is well proportioned and sunny. He is very outgoing and bubbly. He talks nonstop about almost anything to anyone who will listen. She makes friends easily and can play any game, even many at one time. She rarely finishes a task before a new spark of inspiration comes and off she goes. He seems the opposite of the melancholic, as when something bad happens this child seems untouched by it at all. He prefers to smile and continue with the game. If she runs through the house and knocks over your favorite vase, you’ll be lucky if you hear “Oops, sorry,” as she runs by. If someone is sick, her response is “Oh well, I’ll have to go and play with someone else then.” He is often impatient, irresponsible, and forgetful.

Patience is the key to dealing with this child. Remember that the sanguine child lives in the moment and to best reach this child you must capture the child’s interest in that moment. Long explanations bore this child. Keep things short and to the point. In decorating the child’s room, keep it simple. When asking for help from this child, suggest things like setting the table or checking the mailbox. Emphasize doing the job well. Keep punishments and discipline to a minimum, as this child easily forgets why he’s even being punished. Most importantly, understand that the sanguine temperament is the one that most captures the true essence of childhood–a time of endless experimentation, energy, and activity.

The Phlegmatic Child

The phlegmatic child moves slowly and lacks vitality. Most things are a bother to the phlegmatic child. He is sluggish and monotone and often mistaken for being boring. She has a solid base and a strong will, but must be given ample time to complete a task. He doesn’t enjoy change much and his attitude is that if he is fed well has gotten sufficient sleep, and is cared for, he will be happy. The difficulty with this child is that she is too slow. Once her interests are roused, however, she usually comes around. The child with this temperament is usually the easiest child to raise. In the classroom, most children fall into this category.

If a problem does arise with the phlegmatic child, it is usually because he just does not want to do what has been asked. He’ll sit and ignore you and hope that you just go away. When you finally make direct eye contact and physically help this child to move he will oblige. He takes everything literally, so be careful about your choice of words. She will usually do exactly what you ask but nothing more. He is usually very bright, but appears slow because he lacks the sufficient time to finish whatever he has started. She tends to daydream a lot and has difficulty focusing. If you remember to allow enough time for your phlegmatic child, you will discover a very pleasant and happy child to be with.

The Choleric Child

This child reminds me of the expression “all hell breaking loose.” He knows his own mind and plows straight ahead. She doesn’t walk, but instead chooses to stomp to make her presence known. He shouts commands at the playground, at school, at his siblings, and at his parents! She is pushy, demanding, and self-centered. She is usually the leader of the group. He is bossy and impatient with others and slow to accept blame. It’s always the other person’s fault. The choleric child has no middle ground–something is either right or wrong, black or white. This is the child you see having the full-on temper tantrum at the playground or at the mall.

The best way to deal with a child of this temperament is to wait until the storm has blown over to try to deal with it rationally. The child cannot see his behavior at that moment. He wants to be good and to do the right thing, but needs time to calm down before he can see objectively. Because almost every situation has the opportunity to become a battleground with this child, it is important for parents to choose their battles wisely. Create the opportunity to serve others and she’ll do a terrific job if led to it in a positive way. Mostly, he needs a parent who will not be afraid to stand up to his will–one who will later offer the opportunity to go over the event with patient explanation. Only then will the child let you lead as parent and calmly trust your judgment.

Each and every child is a wonderful human being with the opportunity to unfold into a well-rounded and balanced adult. What seem like desperate power struggles and intentional games played by children are really normal personality traits that have not yet beer refined or developed.

All children want to be loved and accepted. There is a lot to learn about the characteristics of each temperament and this article is just a brief introduction. Therefore, I strongly suggest further reading on the subject for a deeper understanding of how each temperament works.

Once you give your child the understanding that he deserves, you will realize that your child is not acting against you or that he suffers from any brain damage. What you may find is how smart, wonderful, loveable, and capable she really is.

Author’s Bio
Dr. Kytka Hilmar-Jezek, or “Kit”, as her friends affectionately call her, is dedicated to assisting you harness your full potential. Kit applies her expertise & credentials as a Dr. of Naturopathy, NLP Master Practitioner, Author, Personal Development Coach, Speaker, The Integration Expert, Reiki Master, Childbirth Educator, Waldorf Homeschooling Guru, Niche Marketing Queen and Serial Entrepreneur. She is an inspirational powerhouse; a mover and shaker who continuously challenges the status quo and walks her talk in all areas of her life…
Kytka “Kit” Hilmar-Jezek uses many different personality tests in her coaching and consultations. Visit her experts page to read her complete bio or to contact her to learn about YOUR temperament.

Visit her websites and sign up to learn how YOU can benefit from her wisdom, experiences & passion. Or see her Experts page here: http://www.selfgrowth.com/experts/kytka_kit_hilmarjezek

In the first seven years of life, the child seeks to see that the world is a place of goodness, and will learn primarily by imitation and through activity. In the next developmental phase (through puberty) the child most naturally learns through beauty, from adults who merit being authorities. (This is why storytelling and art are employed as teaching vehicles throughout the elementary curriculum.) Finally, entering into the third developmental stage, and ready at last for true independent thinking: the teenager naturally begins a quest for truth.

To navigate this site, please use the SEARCH BOX to the right to find the subject matter you are seeking. Because we have over 600 pages (and growing each day) a navigation system isn’t possible and this way we focus on updating content and not the navigation of the site!

It is our hope that this site will become your favorite resource for your Waldorf home schooling and parenting. This site is updated regularly so bookmark it now and remember to check back again real soon for updates and new inspirations.

Blessings, Peace, Love & Light
Kytka Hilmar-Jezek, Ph.D.

PS – The video you just watched (above) is different than the video to the right under the heading: “Mission & Purpose”. These videos are my gift to you. They are all throughout the site, and are all meant to inspire you and get you into the correct mindset for your parenting journey!

To aide in the teaching of the arts of painting, drawing, handwork, and creative play by providing instruction, materials, and resources, in harmony with Waldorf education.

To provide the best possible products and services, in the most socially conscious, economical, and personal way, to teachers and parents working out of the Waldorf School philosophy and curriculum.

To encourage the flow of capital from the economic realm to the cultural realm by donating 10% of profits to the American Waldorf School movement.

To work toward the development and implementation of associative economic principles in our business practices.

I am so ENVIOUS of the education our four children are receiving in our local Waldorf School. I am envious because I long for this education for myself. I am of course grateful that I can learn with them. I have learned to watercolor paint up to the sixth grade level and I can knit as well as the most competent 4th grader! I still can’t carry a tune (although the kinderharp is helping.) I’m even over the trepidation of writing in lesson books and using colored pencils!

The more I enter into painting and wax modeling and knitting and coloring and playing music and painting walls and playing with silk–the more I understand the value of the education of my children. When I try to bring beauty and truth and reverence into our home, I give a gift, and I also receive the gift of my own education.

It’s not always easy to take up these artistic forms…it takes courage to allow myself to learn to knit or play the harp! In the past it was often hard to find the supplies I needed…silk and felt and good colored pencils, or the knowledge of where to start! I hope my experience, the experience of hundreds of teachers and parents, and the experience of our manufacturers, will help you to find the materials you need and the courage to be a kindergartner!

Blessings on the education of your child–and you! We wish for each of you that you will grow as wise as the children through this education, and we hope that we can be of service to you along the way!

Enjoy!

Annette Park
www.waldorfsupplies.com

Geneii of Language (was curriculum/math stories)

From the Prologue, “The miracle of words calls on the ego forces of the writer, speaker/listener, and reader – it calls on the Self. The potential in children for self-expression is enhanced by a comprehensive, consistent, and creative language education – this small manual is directed to these high ends.”

Like most of the Golden Beetles, the Geneii of Language is a small booklet, about 90 pages and about 5″ x 7′. It focuses on the language arts main lessons and middle lessons for the first and second grades.

For 1st, the Mains are The Capital Alphabet, Writing of Nature, Letter Combinations, and the Middles are Foreign Language, Story Speech & News, Letter Structure and Spacing

For Second, the Mains are Lower Case Alphabet, 12 Word Families, Reading and Library. and the Middles are Word Games and Lower Case Writing Practice. (The Drama lesson is in a separate drama book.)

Each section gives you an essay on what the general ideas are behind each main lesson, and usually one or more sample lesson ideas is broadly presented to get you started. The rest is up to you to create. Every once in a while you’ll find a complete lesson plan (as in his grade one music book) but usually not. He is chock full of really great ideas that you can then adapt for your own child, but you have to do lots of creating. If that is what you’re wanting to do, then Golden Beetle might be what you’re looking for.

Often, the information is presented in a story or a wacky narrative. Whitehead is an excellent writer. To me, this sort of helps to pull me into the creative brain mood I have to be in to write lessons. Lots of other people either like the style or hate it–sort of like Monty Python or Kurt Vonnegut. He also believe strongly in embracing the home culture, so Australian culture runs deep throughout, thus inspiring me to bring in our unique culture.

These books also completely embrace Waldorf ideas and thus attribute different lessons to different body forces: the language stream of main lessons is a “head” stream; where the middle lessons are really a literary “chest” stream–thus the emphasis on speaking and doing. It sounds odd at first, but then it really helps to remind yourself what type of lesson you are teaching and where the child should be taking this information in. The different streams combine to awaken the child to language holistically.

I can’t really do the book justice other than to put in another quote (from The Writing of the Bush-writing of nature main lesson), “Now let me see, the essence of a language of Nature main lesson is to expand the child’s horizon to realize that language is indeed a universal principle. A bird inscribes a message in the air with its flight pattern; a koala leaves tell-tale scratches in the bark of a smooth gum tree; a tiny pile of sawdust tells of a witchetty grub inside a stump; ants hurrying their eggs to the penthouse indicate heavy rain on the way. Nature is, as a first principle, language.” – Alan Whitehead

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The Spiritual Syllabus Series is by far the most comprehensive catalogue of the Rudolf Steiner teaching program ever produced….

Q. Dear Kytka, I have just found your web site and it is quite good. I am a trained Waldorf teacher of many years experience currently living in Oklahoma where there are no Waldorf schools. I know many parents here are interested in homeschooling their children and your site may be a very good resource. My question is: What is your relationship to AWSNA? I understand they are very careful with the word Waldorf and I wonder how they relate to your work. I’ve surfed through the questions you’ve answered and the statements you make seem to be accurate, so far. But in skimming your biography…

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Going on Safari!

A safari is the perfect adventure to share with your children or grandchildren. It is an incredible experience that will stay with them throughout their lives. You should see the excitement in a child’s eyes when they see their first safari animal up close and personal. Children are absolutely fascinated with the sights and sounds of East Africa’s abundant wildlife. Such an adventure is a great opportunity to share with young family members how their peers live halfway around the world and to see how different they are, yet how similar. A very special way to spend time together as a family – safari adventures create unforgettable memories for the whole family.

What a great safari is supposed to be:

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Ask Kytka Archives: January 5, 2003

Three Kings Day – Twelfth Night – Epiphany falls 12 days after the birth of Jesus and Christmas, on January 6. It marks the end of the Christmas holiday and many cultures take down decorations and burn the Christmas Tree. Almost all cultures share the celebration of a Twelfth Night Cake in which is hidden a dry bean and a tiny porcelain figurine. Whoever gets the piece containing the bean is charged with buying or baking next year’s cake and the person whose piece contains the figurine has to fulfill a dare by acting out a silly request. It’s meant to be fun….

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“I have come up with images, stories and activities for only about half of the alphabet. Is there an established Waldorf curriculum for this?”

Letter writing is presented in a lively pictorial way with the help of fairy stories. “S” may be a fairytale snake sinuously slithering through the grass on some secret errand. The teacher draws on the chalkboard, showing how the letter is embedded in the picture, how perhaps the W is hiding in the drawing of the waves. The children draw the letter in the air with their hands and on the floor with their feet; their whole being participates in the writing experience. Then the children make their own pictures of waves, and then W’s, creating an illustrated book as each letter is presented and experienced.

In Waldorf education, the letters are presented as pictures which appeal to the child’s imagination. In reality the letter is clothes in the picture…the picture is the key. All letters of the alphabet were once pictures themselves. Are pictures ever drawn on rigid lined paper? (And coloring books are NOT pictures!) Additionally, lower case letters came much later – so we ALWAYS begin with…

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QUESTION: I just recently purchase 3 of Alan Whitehead’s SSS: Genii of Lanugage & Numeria (both for class 1&2) and A Steiner Homeschool? My question is this, Mr. Whitehead speaks of 3 lesson streams: mains, middles & blocks. I think most of us are familiar with the idea of a “main lesson” that lasts 3-5 weeks. It seems that at our local schools, other ongoing subjects are then organized for the late morning & afternoon hours (handwork, music, eurthymy, games, etc.) But Mr. Whitehead’s book seems to organize all the other subjects into the ‘middle’ or ‘block’ lesson (late a.m. and afternoon); and they rotate in their emphasis (such as numeracy, literacy, etc.) similarly to the main lessons. Do you know where I can get more info on this method? Is this method specific to Australia? Any feedback on pros/cons of organizing lessons in this manner?

ANSWER: Rudolf Steiner originally intended the sequential ‘main lesson’ system, as opposed to ‘period’ teaching, for all lessons…

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Rudolf Steiner saw man primarily as a fourfold being. To understand this concept we need to consider Steiner’s views on the human being in relation to the kingdoms of nature:

Firstly consider the mineral kingdom. It is dead, inanimate – a stone does not move unless an external force is applied to it. It is physical structure only, without life of its own. Steiner called this the “physical body”. In the human body the skeleton is the most mineralized, “stone-like” part and can be likened to the mineral kingdom.

Then there is the plant kingdom. Clearly the plant has a physical body, but equally unlike a stone it possesses a life force which enables it to grow, to have shape, to live. Steiner named this the “etheric body”.

Next the animal kingdom. An animal has a physical body and an etheric body, like the plant. Animals differ from plants, however, in that they achieve a certain level of conscious awareness. They have feelings which express themselves through drives, desires, pain and pleasure. We can say, then, that animals are not only living beings, but “ensouled beings” with feelings. Steiner called this the “astral body”.

Human beings share with all three kingdoms of nature with the “physical body”, the “etheric body” and the “astral body “- but the human being is unique. Humans differ from animals in that they have self awareness. Humans, unlike other living beings, possess an “ego”. The power of this individual ego enables humans to walk erect, to speak and think, to be creative, to develop (and also to destroy) civilizations. It also enables them to enter into the spirit of things in a way that is unique among living beings. We see evidence of this in the artistic and social achievements of humanity. The human being has certain capacities which animals lack. Animals do not have a creative culture. Wasps build their nests the way they have always done, and nothing new has been consciously developed by them over the centuries. Foxes use the same technique as their ancestors did for catching chickens. They do not look back upon their history and apply what they have learned to developing new and more effective techniques. They do not participate consciously in the process of their own development and evolution.

Knowledge of man in the true sense must be sought in the way we have indicated. Starting from the processes of nutrition, it must be followed through the processes of healing to the processes of human and world education in …

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